CONGRATULATIONS ! KIJAH
Kijah had her first game back Saturday 26th July, look out all you defenders!
It's been 12 months, and I'm still not back playing.
I always imagined that once I hit the 12-month mark, I'd be ready to go and back on the field, doing what I love. But that’s not how things have turned out. At least, not for me, not yet.
I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t disappointed. Frustrated, even. For the past year, I’ve been holding onto the idea that by now, I’d be back. That I’d be ready. I imagined that once I hit 12 months post surgery, I wouldn’t have to be in rehab anymore. But that’s obviously not the case, I’m not there yet and I still have a while to go. Right now, it’s hard for me to shift my mindset, because playing has always been my end goal. It’s what I’ve been working towards this whole time. But I’m starting to realise, and still need to accept that maybe right now playing isn’t what I need to focus on. The season finishes in a few weeks, and there won’t be any games until next year, so my focus isn’t about rushing back just to get a game in, when in reality this could lead to another injury or cause other sorts of issues.
Kijah had her first game back last Saturday, which marked exactly one year since we both underwent surgery. I am extremely proud of her remarkable progress and genuinely impressed by how comfortable and confident she looked on the ball.
Of course, a big part of me wished I was out there with her. But at the same time, it gave me a sense of relief, proof that coming back better is possible. I’ve been so lucky to have her by my side through all of this, and I’ve learned so much from her along the way. Her journey only took a year, and that was what she needed to get strong and ready. Mine’s just taking a bit longer and I’ve known from the beginning that our paths would be completely different.
The next 6 months are going to look very similar to what I have already been going through. Lots and lots of training. I have no doubt that it is going to be tough. But I can choose to see this as an opportunity rather than another setback. This can be my chance to be challenged at the next level and learn what the environment is all about. I need to train hard every session, become sharper, and really dial in on the small details that matter most.
On a brighter note, training has actually been going really well, which makes it even more frustrating to be held back. I genuinely feel like I’m ready to play, but deep down, I know that waiting is the safer option. I’m starting to feel more like myself again on the ball and am slowly gaining my confidence back. I’m feeling comfortable enough going into tackles, and I’m also learning when to pull out of the riskier ones I wouldn’t have thought twice about before my injury.
I personally think overall I have definitely become a smarter footballer. And I’ve come to realise just how much I took it all for granted. I do appreciate being where I am, and I know that I have it in me to get to where I want to be. It’s just a matter of time (and method).